My life has reached a new level. The last few years I have been “going thru” to say the least, and it feels good to be on the “other side” of a lot of drama and chaos. All of that to say that the last few years taught me that this too shall pass, and I will be okay… I know it because I experienced it first hand. Knowing this does not eradicate fear from my quiet thoughts. Lately, the fears that lurk in the recesses of my mind… are so overwhelming at times.
Today, I choose… to affirm my strength over fear. Today, I choose to… follow my dreams, honor my growth, and not loose my belief in the love of a good man.
“I am not afraid” to see my dreams manifest themselves.
So much of my experiences over the last several years have been filled with frustration, pain, fear of the unexpected/ unknown, and self doubt. I come out of these experiences wise beyond my years and with confidence that I can face anything and I will come out of it okay and better for it.
In so many ways I have come full circle in my life, and am truly a woman “on purpose”. I am very self-reflective and I have been on a quest for knowledge and tools to be a better ME since I was 16 and realized the magnitude of the great responsibility that had been bestowed upon me as I entered motherhood. For so long I defined myself by my circumstances, but I have grown to understand that I am so much more.
“I am not afraid” to be a GROWN ASS WOMAN.
God, my friends, and family know that ‘the path of least resistance” rarely comes up for me when I Mapquest the direction for my life’s journey. “Life ain’t easy” is an understatement to say the least. Over the last few months, for the first time in many years I have been able to step back to see how far I have come. There are many lessons to still learn, but today I stand as a GROWN ASS WOMAN, and I can say that with confidence.
“I am not afraid” to give and receive the love of a good brotha.
Relationships are God’s classroom designed to teach you, heal you, and fertilize your growth as you travel your life’s journey. I can truly appreciate the awesomeness of God’s love in my life. He has carried me through experiences that in the midst of them I did not know how I would get through to the other side. I have learned many lessons:
To love myself enough to let go when the season of a relationship is over; To know that love is not enough, but it is one of the fundamental materials for the relationships foundation; To not let the pain from my past destroy my faith that there is a brotha out there for me.
My grandmother once said,
“Don’t give up on the greatest gift God gives us- love, because another wounded soul has hurt you”.
I hold onto my grandmother’s wisdom most when I am feeling my hope diminish. I know I haven’t gone through all that I have gone through in vain. I have experienced what love is in its purist form in a variety of relationships with family, friends and lovers. I don’t believe there is only ONE person in this world for you, but I do believe in soul connections, and you can experience them in friendships and intimate relationships. I have had the great fortune of making soul connections with some good brothas (as friends and lovers), so I stay hopeful.
Ladies, good brothas are out there... really they are... sometimes we've been so jaded that it's hard to realize it.
I just have to keep striving to be a woman “on purpose”, and the gift of love with a good brotha will happen for me in time. This is not easy and I have my moments of doubt, but those moments pass and I keep the faith that the brotha for me is out there. This GROWN ASS WOMAN will just keep working to be ready for the exchange of love when we find each other.
-Wonder Woman
2 comments:
Oh, this one brought a tear to my eye. This is not for the meek. Man, you really share. I know I said I was "ready to write, ready to share" on my blog- but . . . not really. I'll try to work up to it. I wanna be a woman "on purpose" too.
Go on, girl! *applause* Glad you joined the blogosphere! I look forward to reading more.
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